Sunday, June 25, 2017
DIS IZ TEH LOL GOSSPELL REEDING
Jahn tweet, verse 1-11
Jahn tweet, verse 1-11
Jebus gets oilfeets in Bethany
1 An six days afore it was teh Passovr, Jebus wented to Befany, whar Lazarus livd (teh men he maded not ded).2 An Martha was all liek, "OMG, eat lots, Jebus, becuz we luv u". An Jebus an Lazarus wuz all liek NOM NOM NOM!3 Den dis gurl Mary, she gots reely nummy smelling oils an she rubbed Jebus's feets wid it. Den she tookded her hair and wipeded it off agian, and de hous smelled reely NUMMY, and de nummy smell wuz Jebus's feets.
4 But Judas (who wuz sposed to be Jebus's freind but reely wasn't) was all liek,5 "OMG dat oil, it r worth so many cheezburgrs!!! U shood sell it for cheezburgrs an give dose cheezburgrs to all de poor kittehs. Srsly."6 But reely, Judas was uncaring-cat, an stolded Cheezburgrs for hisself all teh timez.
7 But Jebus was all liek "STFU, kthx. Soon I go be dedz, so I can has oilfeets.8 Dere will alwayz be more poor kittehs, but dere is only oen Jebus. Srsly."
9 Wen all teh kittehs heard dat Jebus wuz thar, dey was all liek "OMG JEBUS!" an also "OMG Lazarus zombie!" an dey all came runnins.10 So teh priests wuz all liek "we can haz kill the zombie?"11 cuz now all teh kittehs lieked Jebus cuz he maded Lazarus not ded, an teh priests wuz unhappy-cats.
7 But Jebus was all liek "STFU, kthx. Soon I go be dedz, so I can has oilfeets.8 Dere will alwayz be more poor kittehs, but dere is only oen Jebus. Srsly."
9 Wen all teh kittehs heard dat Jebus wuz thar, dey was all liek "OMG JEBUS!" an also "OMG Lazarus zombie!" an dey all came runnins.10 So teh priests wuz all liek "we can haz kill the zombie?"11 cuz now all teh kittehs lieked Jebus cuz he maded Lazarus not ded, an teh priests wuz unhappy-cats.
dis b teh word ov teh ceeling kat
tnx b too ceeling kat
go ehn pees n suva teh ceeling kat
